Parked, 90cm x 90cm, oil on linen.  2012

I’d like to say that the studio is all tidy – with enough space to lay works out, contemplate, breathe freely, invite company and sit and think, but it isn’t.

What it is though – is fertile.

Only so deep, 30cm x 30cm, oil on board, 2012

It’s impossible to predict how a space will affect you – the most well laid out studio, with plenty of light and air and a big fat lock on the door, can prove totally uninspiring.  For some reason, I need distance from loved ones, but to feel connected.  I need a bit of discomfort, a bit of muddle and tinny music (not grand acoustics) to make my soul travel.

We have painted the outside, but not the inside.  Indeed the space is still filled with furniture that we have to get rid of, boxes that need to be sorted, bikes that need a home, and a good fumigation because there’s evidence of spiders galore tucked away.  They are doing their bit I know, but I’m not sure I want a huntsman crawling up my leg when I’m doing some fine work and in the zone.  I would like the spiders gone.

The rushes 1, 2012

30cm x 30cm Oil on board.

The adrenalin is flowing.  I have weeks to prepare for the show at 775, and ideas bumping around my head day and night.  I’m getting out there as much as I can and enjoying the heady fumes, fresh air and stairs up to the house for a cool drink of water.

The rushes 2, 2012

90cm x 90cm, oil on linen

For some bizarre reason, there is a muse in the mess.  A vein of inspiration and the freedom to make and leave it set up for the next session.  A freedom I haven’t had for a few years now.  I finally have that feeling back that I need to paint.  Not should, or might enjoy it – NEED.  Powerfully need.   So loving that!

And the secondary theme that works for me for this body of work – a push over to more abstractive works.  There will be a balance between literal and abstraction, with a lot of patterning and more vibrant colours.  I’m thinking they will be hung side by side as a kind of window into each other.

I think it works.  Hope you do too.

We got married!

Last Saturday; we dressed up, threw some flowers together, scoffed breakfast, piled into the car, drove into the city and pronounced our commitment to each other in front of the kids, our lovely photographer and a construction worker off the street who was kind enough to be our witness.

It was FABULOUS!

We didn’t want any nerves, anxiety about other people’s expectations,  worrying about everything going smoothly, or public declarations – followed by hours of congratulations and food that you can’t quite get to for chatting to loved ones and dear friends.  Or speeches.  We didn’t want the emotional exhaustion that follows and can take the shine off what it’s all about.

*A cake with a story

We wanted to quietly escape as a family, and bind ourselves thoroughly in a quiet, meaningful and funny ceremony that would be special for the kids as well as us, and leave us to go forth into our lives freely from there.

We got married in a ceremony that was minutes long, with Fabienne Delsol in the background.  We mixed up our vows.  We did the wrong things with the rings.  We laughed and exchanged funny glances with the kids – who were grinning harder than I have ever seen them.  It was better than Christmas, or birthdays, or anything.

Afterwards we went out for brunch at the cafe we always go to – and kept our secret, and went out for a quiet dinner – just my husband and me for french food.

It was perfect – and funny and uplifting.  Just like our relationship, and it has been quite overwhelming to see how happy people have been for us.  A lovely way to go forward together!

I have to say, from the bottom of my heart – I am so lucky to have met (and married) this man.  He is deeply caring, sensitive and so creative.  He is so smart.  So funny, and has such integrity.  He is absolutely my soulmate.  He is absolutely my best friend and is the most amazing parent – endlessly entertaining, insightful and committed with every fibre of his body.  He is a rock.   He’s also pretty handsome, can undo a stuck jar with ease and reach high things without a ladder.  He smells nice.  And, he makes me feel like I’m pretty fabulous on a daily basis.  I am impossibly happy and am steadily building up wrinkles from smiling so much.  I never thought I could ever be so happy.

Enough sugar for you?  Happy Valentines day my love – you are pure sunshine. xx

___________

* We were having our floor sanded – and the day that most of the work was going to need to happen was on Saturday – our wedding day.  I’m sure my face fell when the lovely sander told me that, and I confessed – that I’d told nobody, but we were secretly running off to elope on that day.  He joked that his wife was a cake-maker and they’d make us a cake.  And she did!  I think it’s the best cake I’ve ever tasted – Bailey’s soaked chocolate cake with a Lindt chocolate ganache – given with extraordinary kindness and being thoroughly enjoyed.  Thank you so much Lisa, Clint and family. 

The secret to happiness is, I suspect, just learning to roll with it – whatever it is.

Our crop of tomatoes has been seriously underwhelming.  But when they come – these little ones – they are the sweetest treasure – savoured, not gobbled and the sweeter for their rarity.  Makes you look at them in a whole different light.

We have an arid spot down the side of the house – dry and hot.  I planted Thyme – which we cook with a lot, and it’s doing sensationally well.

An ebay purchase – in anticipation of moving in and enjoying dinners under the shady tree.  I don’t think we’ve managed a full meal out there yet – but it gives us pleasure just looking at it.

A Gingko tree – planted a few weeks ago and having trouble settling in.  Perhaps I’ve planted it too out in the open?  I’m feeding it like crazy.  I think it’s going to get there  It’s lovely helping it and seeing some recovery going on.  When it gets big, the sense of achievement will be triple-fold I’m sure.

The studio – still waiting for finishing touches and to be emptied – but I’ve done some brush wielding in there and I know it’s going to be sensational. 

And the floor.

Trying to see the happy in this floor……

The extension to our house which comprises an open-plan kitchen and family room was covered with ironbark ‘floating’ flooring. Only it wasn’t floating.  And when we tried to take some of it up it shattered and splintered – holding fast to the adhesive that gripped it tight.  There are secret nails.  There is a giant mess in one section.

There will be an expert coming today to tackle the job.  And we had planned he would take it all up – the entire thing, but after a discussion with a neighbour who has helped on most of the work in our house, it seems that there is at least half of the floor – and probably some patching that would be structure-board (a type of very strong flooring chipboard), which will be in large flat patches, and not be consistent.  Sigh.  There may even be holes…. Crikey.

So we think we’ll be getting our floor man to take up the front half of the house – to make it all beautiful.  And ask him to sand the back ready for painting, and paint it all a uniform white. Which will be Ok I suppose – not the original plan, but then the best houses are slightly kooky in some way or other right?  Wabi Sabi.  Right?

Wabi Sabi is the way to happy.  It is.  I really think it is – the patina, the act of rolling with whatever comes, making it good, or finding the happy in the chip and it’s repair.

And on we roll……

It’s all about the paint lately.

Painting Floors.

And walls.

And preparing for a show in late March with this gallery.

Which has been on my mind for some time.  I’m thinking “Body of water” – because everything in my life seems to be fluidly running in the right direction, which is blissful and lovely. So I’m ramping myself up slowly – resisting the urge to paint more walls and focusing on the art for a little bit and after a morning of underpainting in our Dining Room (Studio is still unfinished) I couldn’t be happier.

Though I can’t wait for the studio to be in order too (just quietly).

It’s evolving – this space of ours.  Some rooms have been more of a challenge than others. In progress -  things have moved in/moved out – been considered and worried over.  Floor plans fiddled with, lights installed.

It’s fun.

This is how our front room looked when we bought it.

First off, we installed a full-wall bookshelf – floor to ceiling – and we couldn’t have been happier than that.  It’s so relaxing to know that we actually have space for more books than we have – and we can collect guilt-free for a while yet.

We did something unexpected this week and adopted a 6 year old Burmese cat that needed to be re-homed.

It was ‘sort of’ the right timing – we fell in love with a burmese owned by my Dad and his partner earlier this year on our visit to Tassie, and had the seed of a burmese and their ‘dogginess’ firmly planted, and while we thought we would get to it ‘soonish’ – there was no plan.  We haven’t even fully unpacked yet, but we are ‘settled’ and looking forward and unwinding and looking forward to the holidays, which will now be filled with something extra to occupy our lives.

“Rory” – as his previous owner called him, seemed to have become a handful – yowling at night, spraying sometimes and displaying anxiety.  He was advertised on the back of our school’s newsletter by a school parent who is also a vet.  So I called – chatted to a few of the vets at the clinic he was staying at about his anxieties and what the possible issues might be, and we went in and met him.

Love.  Instant – all around love and excitement.  And a renaming to celebrate new beginnings (which was advised).  He is now Oscar in our home.

Oscar came home on Saturday and settled in nicely.  I’m pleased to say we have had no night-time yowling, no spraying, plenty of tummy-tickle requests and the odd very-gentle love-nip (which is more of a mouth hold with slight pressure) with a few licks to follow.  Perhaps they are kisses – what do we know.  He is sleeping on our bed.  He is THE most delightful little guy and we just can’t see any problems at all.

The most remarkable thing though is how unaccustomed the kids are to pets.  I guess I just assumed that it was instinctual.  I grew up with a dog, and just knew how to pat it, and chat to it, pick it up and roll around with it.  That’s not the case in our house.

I don’t mean to suggest that they’ve never been exposed to animals – we know people with pets.  It’s just that having your own – with the quiet space to go off and have a chat seems to bring its own pressure.  What if you pat them wrong?  What if you upset them and they don’t bond with you?  What if they just don’t choose to be with you – how devastating!  What if they choose someone else’s bed to sleep on, what if they think you smell funny?  What if they think you are ignoring them – instead of being respectful and waiting for them to come to you and then don’t try again.

It’s a little hard to say lighten up when it’s so desperately important.  Which is wonderful actually – that it is desperately important, and while I knew this was going to be a good thing, I didn’t really know HOW good until he entered our home.

I always thought I was more of a dog person, but it’s undeniably lovely to share your home with an independent spirit who would like to be near you.  Who doesn’t need walking and who does his business in a box.  Plus – he can climb the stairs, which I don’t think a dog could, and is happy to lounge around all day instead of fretting about being alone.  He’s a perfect fit really.

As I was signing the papers, I noticed another leaflet on the counter for an adorable little terrier, and thought it worth mentioning (in case you didn’t know) that vets often re-home animals, and that if you are considering taking an animal, it may be a good first step – to talk to your local vet and see if there’s a little someone who has come from a happy home and might need a little rescuing.

Melbourne weather isn’t known for it’s constancy.  Cold mornings, sunny afternoons, rainy nights (re-arrange ad infinitum).  So the lead-up to summer should have been nothing surprising, but you know, one never quite gets used to it.

Last week the rain held off just long enough for me to get to school collection – dry and optimistic enough to leave the umbrella in the car.  We all got SOAKED on the way back, had showers and lit the fire – the first time for the kids.

We left the lights off, toasted marshmallows and pieces of bread over the fire in the library, drank hot chocolate and dreamed what it must be like to experience a snowy Christmas and be doing this every night on the other side of the world.

We listened to records while a roast cooked in the oven and chatted and relaxed.

Interestingly Mr 10 enjoyed just sitting, watching the fire and appreciating how relaxed he felt – I think that might actually have been a ‘lightbulb’ moment for him.  As time is often filled in with frenzied activity of some kind or other around here – building, drawing, gaming, or conversations of a deep and meaningful nature.

There have been hot days too – the kind that got me remembering the toll those hot days take on a fresh Christmas tree.  We are the kind of people who start looking forward to Christmas from April on, so December 1st is the day a fresh tree goes up.  This means by Christmas day it is looking much the worse for wear – brittle, despite watering, pine-needles all over presents – despite endless vacuuming, pine needles all through the car – because we must choose it ourselves.  Oh but the smell……..

So, on Jo’s recommendation, we bought a fake one.  A very good fake one, and have been decorating it in fits and spurts for the last few nights.

The kids are hoping for a chilly Christmas so we can light the fire on Christmas Eve – which sounds heavenly to me!

“It was as if the clearing was peacefully absorbing her” 2011,  Oil on Board,  30x30cm

“Safe at Home” opened last night in Adelaide.  Wish I could have been there!

“And 30 years later, she’d still remember it s a wonderful day”, 2011, oil on board, 30x23cm .

Safe at Home is a Fundraising exhibition curated and presented by Cube Contemporary Art Projects in conjunction with Victim Support Service SA  http://www.victimsa.org/ .  More information on this exhibition can be found here.

(black  slubby denim with Ikea fabric inserts)

I don’t get much time for sewing at home.  It will come I’m sure, but right now there’s not much time, so things like cushions – though important – have been pushed aside for more important things – like drinking a cup of tea and looking out the window at the lovely trees in the backyard.

I like.

They were on my ‘to do’ list for craft and camp, and I managed to whip out 6 in a late night frenzy.

Fabrics by Cloth, and Aunty Cookie

Craft camp was fantastic – so much inspiration, plenty of giggles and great food.  Suzie went home ill, and you’ve never seen a sadder bunch as her car drove off – it really felt like we were being unfaithful without her there, but sometimes you just need to lie down eh.

I made some dresses too:

excuse the bad pics – I couldn’t get the self-timer working. Oh the drama!

Black version has a tie coming from the waist and tied at the back.  Yellow version has very, very long ties (wraps around twice) and belt loops, blue version has a long belt attached at one side and tying completely around the waist.

All (obviously) from the same pattern first found here.  It’s out of print but I managed to find one from a vintage pattern reseller.  Amazingly Kate on the other side of the coast made one in the same week.  Her pattern is a current one if you are wanting to whip one up yourself.  My pattern had no facings and I left off the zip because it was easy enough to pull over my head and I’m lazy like that.

I also made some denim skirts.  Someone asked me why i was making two.  Honestly, I don’t think you can have enough denim skirts.

This version on the left has yellow bias binding on the waist and hem, and inset pockets with yellow lining and contrast stitching.  The one on the right is a straight A-line with a cloth fabric panel.

I had fun with the details.

The best thing about craft camp is always the company though, and it was such a pleasure to spend quality time with Suzie, Kirsten, Ellen, Maria, Jules, Suzy, and Jo.  There were quilts, ballerina topped pencils, inspiring threads, and yarn dying.  There was incredible food, late  nights and a LOT of rain.  I ate chocolate on toast for breakfast.  Good thing every weekend  isn’t like that or I’d die in a year.  Too fun.  too lovely.

Thanks ladies.

fabric washed and drying, hopefully to be made into something wonderful.

In just a few sleeps I’ll be at craft camp.  No offence to my wonderful life-mates at home, but I really can’t wait to sneak off and start up my sewing machine.  I need want  some new clothes and am craving the fun of making them myself.

The last craft camp was badly timed for me.  There was the auction of my former house on the first morning away – which required a trip back to Melbourne – and a poor night’s sleep the night before.  The auction was hellish, so stressful – and the house didn’t sell (it’s well and truly sold now), which made for an emotional rollercoaster of allsorts for weeks afterwards and a bit too much time quietly fretting and reminding myself that things always work out somehow.  I made some things, and completed a jumper on the knitting machine but left feeling unsatiated in some way.  I needed more, and the flow had been invaded.

This time will be better.

The thing I love about craft camp is the opportunity to be quietly removed from everyday responsibility, keep going on a project for as long as it takes and laugh ones head off at regular intervals.  The food is always good too – and it’s such a treat to walk from the studio to a table, have a break and a chat and then get back into it rejuvenated.

You throw your thread and scraps on the floor, go for a wander if you feel like it and get to pore over other people’s inspiring projects and books, meet new people and indulge in more than small talk over a few days – which is incredibly good and very encouraging for the fate of the human race I think.  It’s bliss to be busy in the company of ladies who understand the creative urge, plus you learn stuff too.

I’m usually more organised than this though – with plans made weeks in advance, some kind of baking ready to share, and plenty of projects cut out and ready to go.  I’ll be lucky this time if I remember to pack a change of clothes, and despite the existence (I am blessed) of an actual cupboard to store crafting supplies and stash in – I can’t quite get to any of it because it’s all still boxed, stacked and tucked away.

I hope I can find my pins….

And my list is very ambitious. A few denim skirts (my uniform of choice), A few dresses -because dresses have become where it’s at for me, some cushions for our new home (which have been in the planning for months and months without resolution), and hopefully some time with the knitting machine.  Also some alterations and a spot of browsing at the local bookshop.

My patterns are still untraced, and I’m not even sure where my travel bag is, but I’ll get there, and it’s great knowing that even if all I take is some knitting, it will be a change of scenery and a lot of fun in excellent company.

I can’t wait.